Monday, March 3, 2014

#Makeup Monday--Contouring

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I’m having one of those days. Don’t worry, it’s nothing awful, nothing terrible has happened. I’m just having (gulp) a FAT day! We all have them, right? If you are one of those women who never has a fat day, please quickly back away from this page so that the daggers shooting from my eyes won’t hit you


My morning started just fine. My husband had gotten us a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts as a little treat, and I reclined in my pj’s and ate one. Of course, by one I actually mean five. Or maybe six. Whatever. Anyway, I decided to take advantage of my sugar rush and be productive and that’s when things got ugly. I took the clothes out of the dryer to begin the dreaded task of folding and figured I would go ahead and get dressed. There’s nothing like putting on clothes that are freshly warm from the dryer, especially on a cold morning like today. Have you ever watched those commercials for some brand of silky body lotion where a hatefully skinny woman slips into her clothes and they drape seamlessly over her perfect body? That was NOT me this morning! In fact, I had to lie down on the couch and hold my breath just so I could button my jeans. Once I stood up, I realized that all circulation below my muffin top would soon cease to exist. Basic daily tasks such as breathing and walking weren’t going to happen in these jeans.


All the magazines I read have shamefully emaciated women modeling complete and utter gorgeousness. I hate them. Those stupid magazines even have the cojones to offer advice about how to avoid “fat days” with suggestions that make my lips snarl when I say them: things like “stay hydrated”, “get plenty of rest”, “make a list of all of the positive qualities you have”, and when all else fails “wear something in beautifully slimming black”. Who am I to think that advice doesn’t apply to me? So I followed all of it. I decided to “rest” on the couch, hydrate with a glass of wine (and by glass I mean the bottle is made of glass), and make a list of my good qualities (I don’t have doughnut remnants on my chin, my elbows are quite slender, and I know how to parallel park a car with only 17 attempts). Oh, and I did it all while wearing slimming black… sweatpants. Elastic is my friend.


Unfortunately, I do need to leave my house today, and since robbing a bank is not on my list of errands I can’t really add a slimming black ski mask to my outfit. Dammit. What this means is that today’s Makeup Monday post is going to be about using a simple contouring technique to achieve a flawless, slender face and neck. With the right facial contouring, I figure I’ll just need to add some lipstick and a big purse and no one will ever notice the size of my ass!



As you can see, I’m not naturally a “dewy skin” kind of gal. In fact, I’m downright splotchy. Here’s my dreaded “before” picture, although I’ll admit that I fell asleep last night with my eye makeup still on so at least I have that going for me:
To get a beautiful contoured look, start with a clean, moisturized face. Apply primer so you’re your makeup will glide on evenly and smoothly. I use Younique’s Glorious mineral makeup primer.

To even out my splotchiness I use a good BB cream like Younique’s BB Flawless cream in Bisque.


Now I’m ready to contour. Some women like to use liquid foundation or concealer for this step, but I prefer to use powder because I find it easier to blend with a makeup brush at the end. It’s all about personal preference. For this look, I used two concealer colors by Younique- “Fierce” and “Fresh” applied with a concealer brush. Of course, the color you choose will depend on your skin tone. Basically, you’ll need a color a few shades lighter than your natural skin tone and another color that is a few shades darker than your natural skin tone.
Placement is key! You’ll want to use your lighter shade to highlight the areas on your face where the light would normally hit, such as under your eyes and on cheekbones, middle of your forehead, down your nose, underneath your eyebrows on the browbone, along your jawline, and on collar bones. Don’t blend yet! Next, you’ll want to use your darker shade to add depth and richness to the contrasting areas on your face, such as the hairline around your forehead, the crease of your eyelids, down each side of your nose and across the tip, the hollows of your cheeks, just beneath your jawline, and directly above and beneath your collar bone. This will help you achieve that slimming effect! Tip: this is not the time to freak about about how this looks in the mirror. If you appear to be wearing war paint right now, you have applied it correctly!
Ok, now it’s time to blend! Use a large makeup brush to blend like crazy using a circular motion. If you have blended properly, you should not be able to detect any visible color lines. Once blended, you can apply a touch of blusher or bronzer to your cheeks for an extra pop, and add some color to your lips for extra contrast. Voila! The transformation is astounding!

Now it’s your turn! Boost my ego! Post a comment and tell me how skinny I look and I’ll send you some makeup samples as a special treat!


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