Brutality

Today, I bore witness to  so much brutality, I don't even want to be part of the human race anymore. Perhaps I will self-identify as a wolverine or a honey badger or a starving polar bear or something like the aforementioned beasts, something far less vicious than a human.

No, I'm not joining the Furry movement (not that there's anything wrong with that). What the world around me today affirmed was something I already knew having spent a lot of my adult life working retail jobs: so very many people are cruel just for the sake of being cruel. Thing is cruelty has consequences and not usually for the perpetrators of said cruelty. Though really it does, it just doesn't always manifest itself immediately. Cruelty damages the soul.

I won't go into the long list of egregious behavior swirling like a perfect storm around what had been my newfound peace and prosperity. It ranged from verbal abuse to physical violation and oddly enough almost none of it was directed at me, but it affected me. I had to make some hard decisions but in the end I know they were good decisions.

Stand by a friend who made an honest but potentially disastrous mistake. Withdraw my son from an unhealthy environment and kudos to my son for seeing it for what it was long before anyone else did. Stop participating in an argument that's lasted over a decade. Any one of those decisions would have made today exhausting. All combined together and stemming from vastly different pieces of my personal jigsaw puzzle, I am leveled. When I need sleep the most it eludes me yet again.

As I lie here, smirking at the sheep I should be counting, I take comfort in the words of Morrissey: "It's so easy to laugh, it's so easy to hate, it takes strength to be gentle and kind." To all those affected by the ugliness of the day's revelations, I pray you will be strong. That's all one can do, pray and do the hard thing. Don't pay the brutality forward because then you become no better than the assholes trying to drag you into their world of misery.

To kinder, gentler days, my friends.

Namaste,
Cindy

Making a Difference Just by Trying to Be Good

Being firmly rooted in Gen X, I can't tell you how surreal it is to read Tweets from the
Dalai Lama. Though given what I understand of Buddhism, his Twitter presence makes perfect sense. Wisdom isn't something to hoard or make accessible to an elite few. Wisdom is to be shared and built upon through democratization. And as good wisdom usually is, one of his latest Tweets is perfect in its simplicity:

"The basic foundation of humanity is compassion and love. This is why, if even a few individuals simply try to create mental peace and happiness within themselves and act responsibly and kind-heartedly towards others, they will have a positive influence in their community." -- The Dalai Lama

It's the last two words that, to me, resonate the most, "their community." I've admitted often enough to feeling as though I'm screaming into a void, but one reason I stay part-time at the EDJ is not only the supplemental income, but also the feeling I get being there. No, not the soul-crushing pain of our current fast-food healthcare system....
Pshhht, that'll be one sinus infection special with a side of sciatica pain meds, do I have your order correct?

No, definitely not that feeling, but the feeling when someone comes to me with a real pain, desperation, or fear I can solve. Then my inner Buddhist kicks in and reminds me to treat this person with compassion: Think right, speak right, act right. And if I made this person's life just a little easier for even the few minutes I get to spend with them, then I know I have done good by being good. Hopefully they pass it along and when/if they do, that's how we all have the power to change the whole world, one small, community-based impact at a time.

But Cindy, you say, I don't have a job like that. I am not faced with people I can help in that way. I work in ___________ (fill in "an office", "customer service", "IT", "janitorial services", "actual fast food", etc.) But there's where you are wrong, my friend. You have the choice every day to treat others with kindness, respect, and compassion. A Roy Rogers clerk name Khazim, who cheerfully helped me at the drive-thru, comes to mind. I fully appreciate the man has a shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty job, but he did it with good cheer and genuine concern for my customer experience. I wasn't having a great day, but Khazim cheered me up and I know I went forth about my day in a better place just because the drive-thru clerk was nice to me. You can make someone's day with just a smile, a please/thank you, or a sincere "How can I help you?". It's easier than you think.

And the beauty of what the Dalai Lama is saying is that you don't even have to be successful with every attempt to be the best version of yourself. I can tell you I failed spectacularly a couple weeks ago, perhaps when it mattered most to someone in real pain (though in fairness, I deserve to make this guy's list when he gets to step 8....just sayin').

Hey, we are all human and prone to stumbling, but thinking right, speaking right, and acting right becomes a habit. The more you try to be good, the more you will do good, here in your own home. Local action, global results. Don't make me go all It's a Wonderful Life on y'all. Go forth and commit random acts of kindness. Do what you feel in your heart is right. You won't regret it, even if it's just for the selfish reason that it feels really fucking awesome.

Getting over the desire for that feeling....well, that's another lesson, and if you learn how, please let me know how ;)

Namaste,
Cindy