Monday, December 6, 2010

Like a what???

As a writer of erotic romance, I spend a lot of time making sure a sex scene sounds (and looks and smells and tastes and feels) GOOD. It's probably unhealthy how much I think about and analyze what's sexy. But this morning a friend let me know that my diligence has paid off. At least for this year.

"You'll be glad to know," he said, "that none of your sex scenes were nominated for the Literary Review Bad Sex Award."

"The what?" I asked.

"Bad Sex Award. Rowan Somerville won this year."

Curiosity piqued, I ran to my laptop and discovered this http://www.literaryreview.co.uk/badsex.html. And I have to say, I agree with the commitee's choice. In his novel, The Shape of Her, Somerville wrote, "...like a lepidopterist mounting a tough-skinned insect with a too blunt pin he screwed himself into her.”* Now, in Somerville's defense, this line came from a sex scene that was NOT intended to be sexy. The description refers to two people who are dysfunctional and having a rough time of it. That being said, the simile IS a wee bit over the top. First of all--as evidenced by the picture above--pinning a butterfly is a pretty delicate activity which doesn't seem to be Somerville's intention judging from, "...screwed himself into her." Also, I can only imagine that working the word "lepidopterist" into a sex scene was a dare issued by a fellow writer. Seems like he's trying too hard. Not a criticism, we've all been there (though I'm pretty sure my editor would smack me on the knuckles with a ruler if this phrase came across her desk, lol). Perhaps Somerville's editor deserves the award for letting that sentence fly. Anyhoo, hats off to Rowan Somerville for accepting the award with good humor by stating, "There is nothing more English than bad sex, so on behalf of the entire nation I would like to thank you.”*


Cheers, Rowan! Keep on keeping on ;D


*quoted from quoted from http://hypervocal.com/news/2010/bad-sex-award-winner-lepidopterist-mounting-a-tough-skinned-insect/

5 comments:

flchen1 said...

LOL! Wow. I have no additional words... Maybe, YIKES :) Thanks for sharing that, Cindy!

Eve Langlais said...

ROFL -- that's horrible, yet funny.
I had to look up lepidopterist and am still shaking my head.

rowan said...

thx for the post Cindy....the real point is, out of context even nabokov on sex sounds crap...Maybe you can read the novel and then judge? Also sadly for me the "award" (such as it isnt) , is not open to writers of erotic fiction....but its wonderful to have feedback of course

Cindy Jacks said...

I think you hit the nail on the head, Rowan. Out of context it is difficult to get the essence of any piece of writing. What I think is so wonderful is that you accepted the award with such grace. And I actually ordered a copy of The Shape of Her from Amazon today, lol. See--there's no such thing as bad publicity ;) Thanks for dropping by.

Cindy Jacks said...

Hey Fedora and Eve, thanks for dropping by. I thought this was such a cool tidbit, I had to share!